I have my Dutch friend Anna, visiting me from Galle for the weekend, and we walked down the road to go shopping, to the supermarket, as I wanted to bake a couple of cakes. Well we walked in, both of us, the brown one and the white one....and then this woman said something loud to me in Singhala, unfortunatly I still don't speak fluently, but I figured out rather too slowly that she wanted my bag. So I gave it, slightly reluctantly, but I gave it in exchange for the coupon, and thought nothing about it.....until I looked at my Dutch friend, who had walked in with me, and who was just standing there waiting, and I realized that she had a bigger bag obviously slung over her shoulder, and she had not been asked for it!!!!!! Oh I was not happy!! I couldn't believe it. The Sri Lankans they treat their own people terribly! It's as if they are racist to their own kind! Obviously they have a civil war, but they also have a huge sense of inferiority towards the foreigners....obviously they didn't know I don't hold a Sri Lankan passport, but had they have known that I was British, they would never have asked me for my bag either! Ha ha, if I were to have told them that there are also white thieves...I don't know whether they would have believed me!!!!
I remember when I went to the beach in Galle with this same friend. We took chairs as she always sits there all day and she goes there for free. Well this time she went with me, and when they saw me they told us that it was just for guests! My friend has never been a guest in that place, but because I was with her, the rules changed... they don't allow their 'own kind' to go to the nice beach and relax there like the foreigners but have to go to the not so nice beaches, even though it's a public place....why can't the Sri Lankan people appreciate their own land, why should they come second in their own land??? Oh by the way...they made us pay!
For example,...it's a little like loads of English people going to a football match, say, Liverpool vs Manchester or something in London, a great game, but all these Italien, American, French people have come and have the best seats, and the second best seats, and the English have to take the ones that are left that are right at the back and you can hardly see the ball. Is that fair?
I know that I have always known this and I have been in cultures like this before, but it actually struck me again and more this time because I was the one who was being treated in this way in a country were I actually look like the people, I could slightly relate...and it felt worse than when people were racist to me in England, there I just shrugged it off, here, I realize, even though it didn't hurt my feelings because it was happening to me, it hurt me more for those who face the injustice and who are constantly squashed and reminded that they are nothing, that there are so many who are treated so badly but they have learned to just shrug it off, ignore and accept, but I just can't seem to shrug it off, I feel burdened for these sad people, whether they be children or adults, and I won't shrug it off and I hope to find some way of getting to these lost people without any vision hope
But I just know that a large part of my being here is to help build people up. I know that it may sound slightly ironic to some people who know me well, and who know that I have not always been of the confident, head held high type and shoulders back type of person who is always bold and knows that they have self-worth, in fact I'm still not where I would like to be with it, but I am still working on it, but I just know that I am here to tell people that they are worth a lot, that they are just as special to God as anyone else and that he loves them as much as anyone else, and that they have so much to give and they have a right to acknowledge themselves in society, not to have to stay quiet, not to always have to serve the 'others' without ever being served themselves, that they have the right to feel that they are someone and not just an inferiority to all the rest. I think that that is a big problem here, especially with the girls, this culture teaches them to be inferior, and to agree with everything that other people tell them, like their families, husbands, and not have their own personal opinions, or if they do have them they must keep them to themselves, that their job is to please others and their comfort and happiness doesn't matter, that they don't need to be loved but they just need to obey. This is not feminism or anything, I just want them to understand and learn that they have the right to be happy and know that they are loved by a Father in heaven.
This tragic way of living, of course as in many cultures is less common with the higher educated richer classes, but sadly overwhelming in the poorer ones, with the people who just think that it is life and that they must just submit to it because that is just the way that it should be. It may be how the culture is, but even if that is the case, we mustn't just tolerate it because the whole society does, and so that is how it is, full stop. This culture is oppressive, the religions here are terrible, and the war is a constant reminder the country is in trouble. But I know there is hope, and I have that hope, and I think that we must start to change that culture one person at a time, and feed into them the love of God and the power of his gift of Jesus, and the love that he has for each individual, one at a time, whether they be pink, black, brown, green or purple, female or male, filthy rich, or filthy without the money, they need to know that OUR GOD'S LOVE IS UNCONDITIONAL AND IS FOR THEM AND THAT THEY ARE PRECIOUS!!!
Today I went to the immigration. I didn't start the application for the dual citizenship as the man said I can't get it because I don't have any papers. I have my Sri Lankan passport, expired about 20 years ago, but that doesn't seem to make any difference, they want a birth certificate! But I don't have one...as I was adopted...and so the man said I need to go and register my birth and get one! I guess better 25 years later than never!
But I got a three month extension on my visa, so I can stay here till mid-April, so that is good, I hope to have gotten all the papers done by then!
The church that I go to is currently meeting in a Hindu temple for the services on the Sunday morning, but from sometime in January they will be renting a hall for a few years, and so they can have as many meetings that they want and just keep all the equipment there,but to get to the point, they asked me to start up a youth group in the church!!!!!!!!
I have wanted to be a youth leader for years, and now, after less than 2 months of knowing these people, they have asked me to do it!!!! It's amazing how God is just putting everything into place with no effort on my part, things are just moving along so smoothly, I am just so amazed. I mean i went to the immigration, found out that it will take a little more time than i thought, but instead God tells me the next step!! He opened other doors that i wasn't even expecting to open!!! This is great, i was beginning to wonder what i was doing here, i want to work with youth and kids, but im not with them ever, and now I will be, and I realized at the end of last week that i am a youth worker, and i spoke it out to the immigration officer and that door opened the same day!! I am just so amazed how faithful God is, he just doesn't cease to amaze me!!!The pastor's wife also said that they will be able to pick me up in the morning everyday to go to the building, and so i will be able to work all day!! oh my.... this will make up for all those years that i wasn't very consistent with my church going!!
Well if I don't write before Christmas, I hope that you all enjoy yourselves and have a wonderful day and have a great New Year also!!
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